I'm not really quite sure what to think right now. It's raining outside, finals are over, I have time to rest. I have time for true, genuine peace. In some ways, I'm really excited about the break. It'll give me time to spend with my Jesus, having Him reveal to me what His plans are for me. But in other ways, I'm a little nervous. I don't have peace about the situation. I'm nervous because I don't have a very solid job for the break, I won't see my WKU girls, and I won't have freedom to go where I want when I want. Also, I'm afraid I'll spend wayyy more than I should. This makes me uneasy. Unpeaceful.
But on the bright side, I know that I am going to spend a lot of time in prayer over the break! There are a lot of things that I feel God is trying to show me, and I've been to busy to stop and listen to Him. I get so caught up in the Scriptural part of my quiet time with Him that I don't stop to just listen to what He wants me to hear. There's a book I read this summer, and I can't recall the title, but it was all about prayer and how to strengthen our relationship with God through prayer. I realized that prayer is a two-way communication: I tell God what I want to say, then wait to listen to what He wants to say. It's a very peaceful time, just sitting in the calmness of the library (on the 7th floor, on the couch next to the education books... such a great place to spend time with my Lord during the cold winter months!), waiting for the Holy Spirit. Leaning on my Father's arms, knowing He'll provide for me. What a wonderful feeling that is.
Often I just like to sit in silence in a lonely place. In those times, when there's no one else around, and all I have is myself, my Bible, and my Jesus- it is at that time that I can say all I need is Him. I don't need lots of friends or a beautiful body or even a loving family. All I truly need in the world is my Marvelous Light- my Only Hope. And that gives me true peace.
Sorry that this was such a rambling blog, but I wanted to express my happiness and reliance on Christ for my peace. And it feels so good to let it out :)