Spoken in the Classroom

I have been working full-time as an elementary teacher for 4 full weeks now, and it has been the best experience ever! I'm getting paid to do something that thrills me, even when the days stretch long.

Who are my students? I spend my days teaching over 30 different students, ranging from K-5th grade. A few speak English as their native language, but most are still learning the basics of the language... which is most of the reason why I am there. But no matter where the kids come from, they truly do say the darndest things to me!

I can't keep this stuff to myself. They just make me so happy. So here is the first installment of "Spoken in the Classroom"... or multiple classrooms, which is really more the case for me.

On adult social lives:
Me: (when teaching on weather) "My friends took pictures of hail this weekend; I'll show you a picture tomorrow."
Them: "Wait, but you're a big person. You don't have friends!"

On co-worker relationships:
"Are you my teacher's granddaughter?"

On side effects:
(whispered) "The dentist said I can't talk because I have a cavity. So I can't read to you for, like, a really long time."

On parents and dating:
"Wait, I think I know you. My dad brought a girl like you home with him before."

On my ravishing good looks:
"Is your name Mrs. Dahl because you look like a Barbie doll?" (um, no.)

On those mean ol' teachers:
"Do teachers like Spring Break? Because I think they just want us to go to school all the time."

On sucking up for prizes:
"I just love learning, Mrs. Dahl; if I could learn all day long I probably would!" (yeah right)